How to express anger in words

Added: Doneisha Orchard - Date: 10.02.2022 09:53 - Views: 12931 - Clicks: 4729

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These actions end up hurting both the other person and us. They feel bad, and we might feel worse. We might regret the insults and judgments we hurled their way. But as Alexander L. Chapman, Ph. D, RPsych, and Kim L. Gratz, Ph. Anger is an important emotion. It can be extremely energizing and motivating, write Chapman and Gratz. In The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Workbook for Anger Chapman and Gratz share thoughtful, powerful skills for helping us express our anger effectively.

Below are several spot-on tips from their book.

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Plus, these words are inherently subjective and only fuel arguments. Because practice is key to expressing your anger effectively, they suggest writing about a recent experience that angered you.

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Next circle your judgements and opinions. Then rewrite the description and replace those judgements with objective language and descriptions. Again, people are more likely to listen and respond calmly to you when you approach them calmly and respectfully. Avoid raising your voice or being aggressive in other ways. The authors also suggest watching yourself in the mirror or recording yourself as you express your anger. This helps you get a better sense of your tone and demeanor.

Another option is to practice in front of a loved one or therapist and ask them for feedback. The first step in asserting your needs is to figure out what your needs actually are. The authors suggest asking these questions:. Next create a script. Talk about what angered you again in a clear and objective way. State your needs and what you want as clearly and specifically as possible. Finally, mention how the person will benefit from doing what you need.

For instance, it might make your relationship stronger or help you reduce conflict. And be sure to practice your script. She developed dialectical behavior therapy. Anger is a valuable emotion, even though we tend to see it as a problem.

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We think of anger as destructive. But anger is actually instructive. What deems it destructive or instructive is what we do with our anger. In other words, it depends on the actions we take. When we express our needs calmly and without judgement, we show respect to others and to ourselves — and maybe we even get our needs met.

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How to express anger in words

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